I’m so horribly busy with my 7th quarter coming to and end… while I wait for Photoshop to save a ginormous file, thought I’d post this:
August 25, 2008…5:28 pm
Tibetan activist squirrel forces Switzerland to miss Olympic closing ceremony
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Well that’s nutty!
It seems that a power outage caused an 80 minute TV blackout across Switzerland just timed so that the entire nation missed the closing ceremony of the Beijing Olympics.
The reason given for the outage was that a squirrel broke into a Zürich power plant and disabled the entire facility. Yes, a squirrel. An Eichhörnchen (am I the only person who can’t pronounce that word while sober?)
Now… I wouldn’t want to be accused of creating conspiracy theories out of thin air… but I must say, this seems pretty fishy to me. For a start, were you or I to enter a power plant, we wouldn’t have the first clue about how to go about shutting the thing down, right? We’d probably manage to turn off the photocopier, or disable a light switch – but a whole power plant? No – this was clearly a highly trained squirrel.
Second, we are not talking about some accident here. This was clearly a Kamikaze squirrel. We are told the rodent actually subjected itself to an 11,000 volt electric shock. That’s commitment to the cause if ever I saw it. No, this was no bungler – this was a fanatical activist squirrel.
Third, we know there have been protests about China’s human rights record in Tibet (and need I even mention the fate of small furry rodents that fall into the hands of Chinese Chefs). This particular squirrel – who I shall codename Bya ma byi (wow.. isn’t there some amazingly useless stuff on the internet!) was obviously part of a highly organised and dedicated gang of suicide rodents.
Their masterplan was carried out to perfection – the timing was perfect. Bya ma byi crept by stealth into the power station and using all the skills he’d learnt at squirrel terrorist training camp, hurled himself into the innermost workings of the switching station at the crucial moment.
The whole of Switzerland was blacked out – nobody could receive coverage of the Olympic closing ceremony.
Of course, it was Bye Bye to Bya ma byi. But then, some technicians in Zürich are probably dining well tonight.